Week 50 - I'll do it!

"If you want something done, ask a busy person." (Benjamin Franklin)

For as long as I can remember, I'd have to admit to being one of the above busy people. Notably, I use the word "admit" and I guess that this tends to add some kind of negative connotation to the term. To be honest, I'm still not sure how I feel about spending most of my time in a pretty active state.

Question: What kind of relationship do you have with being busy?

Action: Consider how your life would change if you altered your pace and slowed things down on certain days or at certain times.

Week 49 - One sentence

"He preserved the union and freed the slaves." (Reference to Abraham Lincoln)

Begin with the end in mind:

In his book, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Steven Covey emphasises the importance of exploring what you want from life, your vision for yourself and who you would like to become. In support of this process, Daniel Pink references a number of individuals across history (see Mr. Lincoln above) and then encourages us to think about our own one sentence (e.g. "He raised four kids who became happy and healthy adults).

Question: What's your one sentence?

Action: It's pen and paper time; having thought about the question above, write the first sentence that comes to mind for you. Continue to tweak it over the next few days and weeks. After this, keep it somewhere accessible.

Week 48 - I'm listening, I promise.

“To listen is to love.” (Fromm)

Giving your undivided attention to another and taking steps to make them feel that you value what they have to say is a powerful process.

Question: What does giving total attention to another look like?

Action: Slip your phone back in your pocket, turn off the tv or put down your book when talking to another person.

Week 47 - Good Morning!

"I used to love night best but the older I get the more treasures and hope and joy I find in mornings.” (Terri Guillemets)

Over the last number of years, changes to our morning routine have helped to create a relatively calm start to the day in our house. An earlier start, a lack of rushing and a couple of boiled eggs see us all off on our way in relatively good humour (typically).

Question: What works really well in your current morning routine?

Action: Experiment with working one of the following into your daily starts: more time (e.g. try to carve out 15 extra minutes), a short exercise (e.g. 10 squats), journaling (e.g. write down one thing you are grateful for) or a bit of breathing (e.g. 3 deep breaths).

Week 46 - This is for you

"No person was ever honoured for what he received. Honour has been the reward for what he gave." (Coolidge)

Coach John Wooden highlights the power of giving away throughout his book, Wooden. Interestingly enough, his emphasis is not on physical objects. He proposes that a number of the things we are seeking, namely happiness, freedom and peace of mind, are only achieved when we take opportunities to provide them for other people.

Question: How do the experiences of giving and receiving differ for you?

Action: Experiment with trying to give each of the following to someone else across this week: happiness, freedom and peace of mind.

Week 45 - New beginnings

"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T.S. Eliot)

In her book, Katie Milkman discusses the power of fresh starts and/or perceived fresh starts in increasing optimism, shaking up bad habits and acting as a stimulus for change. While new beginnings in January are clearly the most notable, she brings our attention to a long list of potential occasions that can help us reset and start again, including birthdays, anniversaries, start of a new season, life events, routine changes or just Mondays. It's a matter of picking one and getting cracking.

Question: What positive change that you've been thinking about could do with some leverage?

Action: The time for new year resolutions is long gone, but choose an alternative clean slate to power up a positive change. The 1st of March?

Week 44 - Go raibh míle!

"A grateful mind is a great mind which eventually attracts to itself great things.” (Plato)

Gratitude is regularly emphasised as a powerful source of positivity. Jay Shetty dedicates a chapter to it in his book and proposes that practising gratitude can support improvements in wellbeing, self-awareness and our relationships. He suggests that giving thanks is how monks start every day too.

Question: What role does gratitude currently play in your life?

Action: Maintain a focus on gratitude across your days and try to notice different things to be thankful for. If you have time, keep a notebook and write a few things down every night before you go to sleep.

Week 43 - One lump or two?

"In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun and - SNAP - the job's a game!" (Julie Andrews)

If you're looking to make a change in the long term, Katie Milkman argues that sweetening the required short term actions is likely to prove a significant support. She proposes the use of temptation bundling as a strategy to support positive habit development. Essentially, what you do is try to run the action you want to do at the same time as an action you enjoy doing.

Question: Which difficult change that you are trying to make could you pair with something you enjoy doing?

Action: If you're struggling with the question above, try experimenting with or tweaking one of the following temptation bundling examples-

Listen to a podcast or album you love while exercising.
Watch a favourite tv show while ironing or doing household chores.

Week 42 - 42

"The only way out is through." (Frost)

Let's take things nice and handy this week. The newsletter has been running now for 42 weeks and I feel like it's time for a bit of a break from all of this challenging thinking lark.

Question: What is the meaning of life?

Action: Go and ask someone, "What is the meaning of life?" Answers in an email to info@mccoaching.ie would be very much appreciated.

Week 41 - Guiding lights

"Most of us are experts at solving other people’s problems, but we generally solve them in terms of our own and the advice we give is seldom for other people but for ourselves." (Nan Fairbrother)

At a recent talk I attended, Jim Gavin discussed the different types of roles we can assume when leading and/or supporting others. He suggested that one way to look at our interactions is through the lens of the lighthouse and lifeboat metaphors.

Question: What is your default approach to supporting others?

Action: Fill in the blanks: Lighthouses support others by ____________. Lifeboats support others by ____________. Be a lighthouse for someone this week.